057: Exclusive Entrance to Heaven

The promise of heaven, salvation or even Nirvana seems to be one of the most sought-after "commodities" among the religious. And I believe generally, we are split into two camps concerning the issue. One one side we have people who consider heaven to be the ultimate goal in life. On the other side, we have those who consider the afterlife overrated, if not preposterous. Yet, the funny thing is on both sides of the fence you have both the religious as well as the non-religious.

INSISTENCE AMIDST RESISTANCE
Some of you might find this a little upsetting, but it's an important issue that needs to be addressed. I believe that all the 3 major monotheistic religions claim to have exclusive rights to heaven. While I can accept that this is the dogma of those religions, the approach towards disseminating this "info" can be unsettling, sometimes to the point of being high-handed or even arrogant. While the underlying intentions may be good, the tactics continue to be the thorn in the sides of a lot of people. Christians, especially the Protestants seem to be guilty of this, a lot. Surely you must have heard this little quip, "Born-again Christians are a bigger pain in the ass the second time around!"

Someone related this sad story to me once. A boy is born into a Taoist family. He grow up and eventually finds God in a Protestant church. The experience was so powerful that over the years, it eventually led him to serve God as a pastor. As his family came to terms with his conversion, he found it difficult to accept that they themselves were not as open to Christianity as he was. It was here that trouble began brewing in his household. Eventually, one day he was confronted with the impending death of his beloved mother. As she laid in her deathbed, he realised that his mother did not have anymore time. If she were to be "saved", and if she were to be guaranteed a place in Heaven; as his Jesus had promised him he would have to act now. So there he was, frantically trying to get his mother to say the "Sinner's Prayer" before she breathes her last. His family on the other hand, found him disrespectful. "The woman is dying! Let her die in peace," they cried. In his frustration and desperation he pleaded with them, "If she doesn't accept Jesus now, she will end up in Hell!!!" And that was far too much for them to take - so they drove him out of the room and eventually out of their lives and their hearts. And his mother dies without ever receiving her "salvation".

CAN WE HAVE SOME TACT, PLEASE?
Everytime I think of this story, I'm torn. On one hand, I feel for the son who wanted the best for his mother. Yet on the other hand, I also feel the grief of the family. And my only thought about this is: Could there have been a better way to approach this? I apologise to all you Christians if you find this offensive, but the fact is, some Christians just never developed any tact in handling such a delicate issue. Here's an observation for you. It is my opinion that amongst the religious (or so-called religious), the Muslims are possibly the most passionate about their beliefs - sadly, sometimes even to the point of violence! And yet, I have never had any Muslim come up to me to evangelise or preach their religion. While on the other hand, to the Christian it's like this great recruitment drive! Why is that? Lately, I have also noticed some Buddhist doing this. Buddhists youths are walking around town giving handouts about Buddhism and inviting people for special events. What gives!? At least the Christians received their Great Commission. What's your excuse?

One of the most vivid memories I have of growing up is how my grandmother use to beat away Christians missionaries with her broom. She found them terribly offensive - Protestants, Mormons, Jehovah's Witnesses, the whole lot of them. So it pays to remember, no matter how well-meaning you may be and even if you indeed have exclusive rights to heaven, a broom in your face is still gonna hurt bad.

a freudian spit generated @ 11:56 AM | |

 
056: The Holy Grandfather

Today, on my way to a regular appointment, I noticed that someone had erected a shrine on the road shoulder in this fairly busy business district in PJ. If you live in Malaysia, the chances are you would have encountered one of these little altar-shrine thingies. It's a tiny hut, usually no bigger than 9 sq ft. It's usually painted red and is embellished with traditional Chinese architecture. This would be the home of the Datuk-deity or Datuk Koong in Cantonese.

UNIQUELY MALAYSIAN DEITY
If you're aware of the worship patterns of most Chinese-Taoist, you would know that most believers consider the Datuk-deity pivotal to their well-being. Now, this worship is uniquely Malaysian, in the sense that you wouldn't find a Datuk Shrine in other Chinese populated areas, i.e. Hong Kong or Taiwan. In fact, one of the most surprising thing about this largely Chinese practice is that the Datuk-deity is in fact the spirit of a Malay Bomoh or shaman! Which is why, you'll notice that the Datuk-deity also goes by the Malay moniker of Datuk Keramat which loosely translates as the Holy Grandpa.

There's an even more surprising thing all of this. If you are aware of the protocols of the Datuk-deity worship, the you'd know never to give pork as an offering to Datuk Keramat. The reason is plain an simple - Datuk Keramat is assumedly a Muslim. Do you even see the irony of this?

BAD TOILET TRAINING
I've heard some stories. You've probably heard them too. Man decides to emulate his forefathers by going into the jungle for food or medicine. And being a wise-ass, he decides the jungle is as good as any toilet. So he proceeds to take a whizz and in doing so, desecrates the domain of Datuk Keramat. A pissed-off Datuk teaches him a lesson he never forgets by making him really sick. I have even heard tales of the Green-faced Datuk Keramat (apparently there are many), who is the most ruthless of them all. If you ever take an indiscriminate piss or shit near him, then you'll be the sorriest schumck that ever used the jungle as your john! People have died from such an act - and those are the lucky ones. Others have been paralysed for life. And all that suffering for just doing what nature intended.

So that's where it began. People started praying to Datuk Keramat to appease his anger. People began making offerings to this spirit-of-the-forest, just so he'd leave them alone. And it just went on from there. And then some bright spark probably came by one day and decides, "Hey, maybe I could ask for some nombor-ekor!" and soon enough, people began to worship Datuk Keramat as though he were a god.

ENSHRINED IN SUPERSTITION
Today, you'll see those little shrines everywhere. In the jungle. On road shoulders. In construction sites - apparently developers and engineers are a superstitious bunch who woulnd't proceed with any construction unless they have made offerings to Datuk Keramat. And the thing about these little shrines is this: if you built them, they will come - the worshippers, in throngs! I think generally, people are so eager to get on the good side of God that they willingly accept anything, or anyone as God.

Here's a piece of advice as good as any you'll ever get: If you need to go, use a toilet. That's what it's there for!

a freudian spit generated @ 7:29 PM | |

 
055: The Math of Reincarnation

It's been awhile since I last blogged. Thanks largely to your commentaries, I have set myself on a pilgrimage - an electronic one, no less - to find the true face of Buddhism. However, I believe you will agree that no matter which sect of Buddhism you belong, Buddhism today has become so widespread, infused with so many different traditions and cultures that it's hard to discern what true Buddhism is. But today, I just want to focus on some of the things that bother me about Buddhism - with the hope that someone can provide some answers.

CHECK YOUR BOTTOM LINE
Reincarnation. An important aspect of Buddhism. Aside from the fact that the very concept itself borders on mysticism and the supernatural - which some Buddhist are adamant to say is not characteristic of Buddhism - the very notion that we reincarnate is just doesn't add up. Bear with me, I'm naive. At the last count, the world population was 6,314,000,000. Just a century ago, the population was a mere 1.6 billion. Do you see what I'm getting at? Should the world population be the same now and a hundred years ago? In fact, we out to have a decrease in the total on account of some nice guys attaining nirvana!

Origins. Does Buddhism have a clue in any of this? Where did we come from? Currently, two theories seem to dominate this subject - creationism and evolution. Creationism calls for the existence of a Creator God, which Buddhists do not believe. On the other hand, purveyors of evolution claim "omne vivum ex vivo" or "all life from life" which would have to dictate that life and mind came from nothingness. Buddhists do not accept this at all. So how?

ENLIGHTEN US, PLEASE
Enlightenment. Siddhartha Gautama sat under a fig tree and gained enlightenment. In his meditative state, he found answers from within himself. But didn't Isaac Newton too find enlightenment under a tree - specifically the apple tree? So why do we not worship Newton instead? While Newton's discovery has been scientifically proven beyond a reasonable doubt, alas the same cannot be said for Buddha's theory of reincarnation. Yes, indeed Siddharta came out with a spectacular concept beyond human comprehension, but so did HG Wells when he wrote "The Time Machine". So, was HG Wells enlightened? Or was he merely inspired?

Now let me just say that apart from the supernatural aspects of Buddhism, I must say that Buddha's concepts for living life are practical and almost flawless. In fact, if you subscribe to Buddha's recommendation of living life, I'm pretty sure you'll be an all-round great guy. But that does Buddha's teaching constitute a religion? Does it satisfy man's search for the ultimate truth?

Here's an analogy to chew on. Supposing as a child you wandered away from your parents in the supermarket. And suppose, a nice couple takes you home and adopts you, bringing you up to adulthood. Would you ever search for your biological parents, if not to rekindle a lost relationship, then at least to see what they look like? Or are you satisfy with your current perception of the truth?

a freudian spit generated @ 8:26 PM | |

 
054: The Right Rites

Suresh's posting in his blog today is a subject close to my heart. What if your religious orientation clashed with your social obligations? What do you choose? In case you didn't click on the link, Suresh's gripe is with a born-again (Christian, I assume) son who refuses to bury his father according to their traditional Buddhist customs - as per his mother's wishes. As a result, she's heart-broken and we question his filial piety. But is it really as clear-cut as we see it?

BURRIED PRESSURE
Some years ago, a buddy related to me an incident in which her best friends' dad passed on. Naturally, the whole family grieves at his untimely passing. Anyway, coming from a traditional Chinese-Taoist family, they choose to bury him in the only way they knew; the Taoist way. Unbeknownst to them, however, Dad had secretly converted to Islam. To cut a long story short, on the day they lower him into the ground a group of Muslims comes and demands back the body of their brethren. And came, they did with the cops, the religious teachers and a whole load of kampong folks. So there, amidst the commotion and the tears, Dad is exhumed and taken back for a proper burial according to Muslim rites.

At the first glance, we might question the Muslim folks for their tact. After all, couldn't they let this one slide? Wasn't it just plain cruel to dig up the dead in front of his grieving family? But on the other end of the stick, we also see a bunch of people "taking care" of one of their own. After all, a proper Islamic burial is in accordance to Allah's will and might ensure a Muslim's way to Heaven. Of course, I'm just assuming.

THE DIVINE DIVIDE
Now, I can't comment too much on Buddhist funeral rites as I don't know much about the subject but in terms of Taoist practices, the funeral proceedings are the protocols to ensure that the deceased gets a "safe" passage to the Netherworld (read my previous posting, 011 : To Hell with a Taoist). That alone, might offer us some clue as to why a Muslim, or even a Christian might oppose such rites. But here's where the problem begins. For the Taoist, if the funeral rites are not performed according to protocol the decease will suffer. And that subsequently jinxes the future generations! But in terms of Muslims and Christians, I can only assume what their fears are - that if a dead has already been committed to Hell, surely he's lost all hope for Heaven!

I can't say where I stand on this one. The lines are really blurred here. Even more so, when beliefs come into play. For the people who do not believe or do not know the implications of burial rites, ignorance is truly bliss. "Let's just do the one that everyone wants". As for me, I don't know. But here's what I do know - I could never do anything to hurt my parents. And I would always want what's best for them, even in the afterlife. And that's where the problem begins.

a freudian spit generated @ 1:17 AM | |